|What Can I do?||Supportive statements||the pics|
|Millennium Decision - it's a giant gnome:
Wymsey Parish Council yesterday confirmed their choice for the Wymsey Millennium Statement - a 350 high inflatable gnome which is to be funded, at a cost of £250,000, by the Rural2000 Development Fund. The decision which is bound to be controversial was made in a closed session of the Council on Wednesday evening. A press release indicated that competition had been stiff and that an offer by the winning design team, Plastik Fabrik Konstructon GMBH of Duttlehammar, to refurbish the Village Hall had not been a deciding factor.
Plastik Fabrik Con is one of Europe's leading PVC implementation companies and a spokes person for the Company told the Chronicle that plans would be made available to the public during January. Asked about the effect upon the Green the Chronicle was informed that a special raised wooden floor would be used to minimise wear and tear. He also told us that the Earth Ecology Unit at the University of Watchester (UWAT) were being asked to carry out an Environmental Impact Assessment as well as a plant analysis so that the Green could be appropriately reseeded early in the Spring of 2001.
Questioned about aircraft from RAF Watchester the spokes person said that at 100ft intervals there would be a red light at each of the cardinal points of the compass and on top of the Gnome's head.
Construction of the Millennium Gnome will begin in August and it will fully functional in time for the celebrations on New Years Eve, 1999. The Gnome will be deflated on New Years Eve, 2000.
Gnome Unveiled Amidst Royals Shock:
German PVC artist Gelda Sprongstein, commissioned by Plastik Fabrik Con GMBH to design the Wymsey Millennium Statement, yesterday revealed her impression of the Gnome. Ms Sprongstein stated that the 356 foot tall Gnome would have a carbon fibre frame and be anchored by 27 half inch (12.5mm) steel guy ropes painted red, white and blue. A 400kw air compressor would be used to maintain inflation and there would be 12 airlocked entrances and exits.
It was also revealed yesterday that no members of the Royal Family would be available to open the Millennium Gnome on New Year's Eve 1999, this news was bitterly received by the Parish Council who now have the difficult task of finding a suitable celebrity to perform this important function.
gnome haters threaten sitdown:
"Tacky, tasteless, insulting and New Trash" were just some of the descriptions heaped upon the Wymsey Millennium Statement at last week's Parish Council Meeting.
Major General Barking-Barking was in apoplectic form and at times had to be physically restrained by fellow Council members, the general and two other Members,
John Applegate and Gordon deStompe are fervently opposed to the Gnome. Mr deStompe told the Chronicle, "This is crass, tasteless and typical of the dumbing down Wymsey has been experiencing since this pack of show business obsessed smoothies took control of the Parish. What we want is democracy not pvc gnomes."
Mr deStompe informed the Meeting, to loud cheers from the public, that the people of Wymsey had formed NNN (No Nome Nohow, sic) and were prepared to take their protest to the village green where they would encamp to prevent construction of the gnome.
Camp Grows & Grows:
At the latest count over 100 tents are pitched on the Green with people coming to Wymsey from all over England. A ten person delegation from the Dutch Millennium No Big Deal (MNBD) arrived by bicycle on Tuesday and on Monday a small group from Y2KYAWN arrived from Glasgow.
The major TV companies have all sent crews and Jeremy Paxman hosted a 10 minute feature for Newsnight. Local radio station, UWAT FM, having been running their nightly 'Dance 'til Dawn' programme from the camp.
What of the enemy? Julius Blaah, as usual, has his head in the sand and is destined to get a kick in the butt at next Thursdays byelections. The NNN candidates are standing unopposed so are bound to win all three seats but a good turnout will send a message to those who want the millennium to be marked by a plastic gnome.
NNN Marches In Protest:
Monday, April 26th. County Hall, Watchester, was the destination of the NoNomes NoHow Protest March in which over 500 people and assorted mongrel dogs took part.
In side County Hall the Planning Committee were considering the lack of planning permission for the Gnome. The marchers were angry but well behaved.
Earlier, Councilor Julius Blaah had sought to have the march and protest banned claiming it was unconstitutional in the run up to Parish Elections. Chief Constable, Sir Arbothnot Ayrloam OBE, reluctantly disagreed with the Councilor and decreed that the Protest could go ahead (not that he could have stopped the groundswell of Wymsonion opprobrium once it was on the streets).
|Victory! Monday, June 13th, 1999. There was dancing on the Green this week when, on Wednesday, it was announced that Wymsey Parish Council announced their decision to abandon plans to celebrate the upcoming Millennium with the proposed 350 feet high Gnome. Campaign leaders were jubilant as protesters began to pack and clean up the Green. Many Groups and Organisation took part and/or supported NNN (see Roll of Honour, below), we would particularly like to acknowledge the support of the Wymsey Chronicle and UWAT FM 109.5|
AAGS - Anarchists Against Gnomes - thanks for your input.
What you can do
Messages of Support
From the Editor of the Wymsey & District Chronicle:The Wymsey Chronicle normally bends over backwards to remain neutral on controversial local issues but in this instance the Editor and Board cannot but agree that the Parish Council's chosen way of celebrating the Millennium is tacky, an obscene waste of money and an insult to the intelligence of us all.
May we also inform readers that certain, off the record, threats have been made to this newspaper concerning our access to certain sources of information and advertising revenues. We will not be intimidated! In fact, we will be putting the full might of our resources behind the NNN campaign.
We will prevail! We are sending three of our best agents to assist your plotting.