the quizz
perfect bliss?
A fine pair of sandals.

greatest fear?
Not being here.

historical figure?
Honeire de Haviland.

deplore in one self?
So much.

deplore in others?

What vehicles do you own?
Morris Minor Estate.

Unappealing habits?

favourite word?

Great British Pews
by Henry Timpkins.

favourite radio station?

Anything between 1966 & 1975.

Jam roly poly pudding.

My tantra.

Les Enfants des Tibet.

greatest love?

What has life taught you?
Read the final page last.

How would you like to die?

Are you religious?

the Nam

The Nam's chapel Gordon came to Wymsey some ten years ago when be purchased the old Methodist chapel and has been converting it ever since, he makes a living by selling off the Victorian pine pews, of which he still has over 300 at 150 each, and selling his organic vegetables. Gordon was nicknamed The Nam due to his pony tail and his addiction to self development courses.
Gordon arrived where he is today by going to a comprehensive school, studying sociology at Sussex and consuming vast quantities of illegal substances in the early seventies.

If you drop into the public bar of the Crown & Thorns of an evening you're sure to find The Nam in the public bar. And if you are in the market for a six foot Victorian pine pew or some organic onions where better to go than Gordon's Chapel Emporium (closed Wednesdays and Sundays)?

The Nam gets on well with most people but is very sensitive to auras, he had an almighty falling out with the people at the Ernest Stuffe Institute a couple of years ago but is rather vague about it. He is also against the Forces of Repression which around here comes down to the Copper, Sergeant Brightstone.

Gordon writes: "There are times when Wymsey beggars belief, where else could one find glorious indifference in bed with such determined political action as the banning of American walnuts and Kiwi fruit? Who has campaigned for Caribbean bananas as assiduously as the people of Wymsey?

Of course, there is a price to pay for taking such stands and the Village is often attacked by detractors of all hues but we're grownups - we can take it. The Engish Government, for example, has actively ignored us and our desire for self-determination, those smooth be-suited jonnies in North London have worked out that there are no votes for them in these environs. Wymsey is not on their map. Thankfully we have other friends, France and the Corodos Liberation Front (FLC) have been overwhelmingly supportive.

What upsets me more than the English Government is the attitude of some within our midst, take ex-councillor Julius Blaah who was democratically defeated in last years parish election and the European Parliamentary election. This man opposes everything we do, he supports the Millennium Gnome (it was his idea), likes genetically modified food (he consults for Montantrum Bionics) and calls the Council 'a bunch of loonies.'

Minor irritations aside, life in the village is full of pleasant surprises, belligerence, beer and skittles.

Historical note: The above was obviouly written before we gained our freedom from the English yoke, became a micro-state and a keen member of the European Project
Since that time, as leader of the then Parish Council Gorden became, de facto, leader of the State Council. A position he has held ever since.

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